Impact By Serving
“You can do this.”
“You are better than these guys.”
“We believe in you.”
“We got your back.”
“Trust your stuff.”
“Take a deep breath and relax.”
“We are going to come back from this.”
“We are going to put some runs on the board!”
“You are going to go back out there, throw strikes and put up a zero.”
These were the phrases coming out of my mouth as our team found ourselves in an unfamiliar and unexpected situation.
My roommate was the starting pitcher that day. I was on the bench. The irony of the situation went much deeper. You see, my roommate was in the very situation that I wanted to be in. He was the starting pitcher. I was not. He had the role on the team I wanted and thought I would get. I didn’t. My roommate was a hard-throwing left-handed pitcher from California. I was an average right-handed pitcher from Canada. My other roommate and I needed another roommate to help with the rent so the new recruit moved in with us after the Christmas break. Before he arrived on campus in time for the 2nd semester, I was believed to have the inside track on the final starting pitcher role on the team. That was until my new roommate showed up. As you may have already guessed, I was jealous. After a strong fall I was looking forward to an expanded role on the team. Unfortunately for me, that expanded role wasn’t going to happen. Our coach had the opportunity to make our team better, and as he should, he did. The result was me moving to the bullpen and not getting the role I wanted.
To make things more interesting my new roommate and I didn’t exactly get along. We tolerated each other and hung out from time to time, but it was a strained relationship. But something happened as I watched my roommate head to the locker room with his head down, frustrated, angry and rattled. He had surrendered 5 runs to the start the game and was ready to take out his frustrations in our vacant locker room. I made sure to cut him off by putting my hands on his shoulders, looking into his eyes and saying everything I could to try and build up his confidence. After a few moments I could see him start to relax and re-focus on what he had to do next. We scored a few runs in the bottom of the inning and when my roommate took the hill for the 2nd inning he was able to put together a scoreless inning. We ended up coming back to win the game and eventually were able to advance to the Division II College Baseball World Series.
I hate to admit this but for the previous 4 seasons, I would occasionally hope that my teammates would fail. Their failure meant that I would possibly get a chance to succeed by getting more playing time. I would often find myself sitting on the bench silently cheering for the other team to do well so that I might get an opportunity to perform. It was totally messed up and is difficult for me to admit, but it was the truth. I was envious, frustrated and resentful. My attitude was awful and because of it, I was not a very good teammate. Rather than looking for opportunities to grow and serve my teammates and coaches, I was prideful and arrogant.
Before my final and 5th season, I decided to commit to a couple of things I could control. I decided that my main focus for my senior season would be on my effort and attitude. I wanted to enjoy my final season of college baseball and I figured the best way for that to happen was to focus only on the things I could control. I would work hard every day in whatever role I was given by the coaching staff and try to be the best teammate I could be. So, when my new teammate arrived at the beginning of the 2nd semester, my commitment to focus on only the things I could control was challenged as I soon realized I was going to be bumped down the depth chart. And, to make matters worse, I was going to be living with the new guy who I felt was stealing my spot.
With our season on the line none of those personal feelings mattered. The only thing that mattered in that moment was finding a way to help the team in whatever way I could. My teammate and roommate needed help and in that moment I decided I was going to be the one to support him. In that brief 30 seconds, we were able to put aside our differences because we were united by a common goal. We weren’t best friends, but we were teammates on a mission together. I may not have thrown a pitch that day, but I learned that every great team needs role players who put the team ahead of themselves. I had always wanted to be one of the major contributors on the field, but that season I learned that I could influence the outcome of a game by being a great teammate and by giving a great effort and having a great attitude despite the circumstances.
“Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others (Philippians 2:3,4 ESV).
Hoping my teammates would fail for my selfish gain was an exhausting experience. Rather than focusing outward I was constantly focusing inward. Season after season my bitterness and jealousy would increase, keeping me from realizing how fortunate I was to be playing Division I and II baseball on some very strong teams with some great people. Eventually, the mental exhaustion became too much and I was able to experience what it felt like to celebrate other people’s successes rather than being jealous of them. I became a fan of my teammates by changing my heart posture by wanting to see them succeed. There were still times of jealousy but going to the ballpark every day was a much more enjoyable experience that final season. Becoming a fan of my teammates increased the impact I had on the team that season and allowed me to finish my college career with a sense of satisfaction and contentment.
ssowden@briercrest.ca
